Dear Diary, 

I am so sick of every time I tell someone I am lesbian, they ask if they can watch. It feels exhausting not being able to exist as a lesbian without some man objectifying my identity. For far too long, lesbians have been the punchline in the music industry, and it needs to stop.  

PnB Rock’s song “I like girls” blew up on Tik Tok in 2021. The song begins with the lyric, “I like girls who like girls.” I am also a girl who likes girls, so why do I take such issue with this song? Well, because PnB Rock is a dude who fetishizes women loving women relationships.  

PnB Rock is not the only musician who is notorious for objectifying the relationships of lesbians. Drake’s album Certified Lover Boy contains the song “Girls want girls.” I could not help but cringe at the opening lyrics of the song. “Starin’ at your dress ’cause it’s see-through / Yeah, talkin’ all the shit that you done been through / Yeah, say that you a lesbian, girl, me too,” Drake sings. Somehow, Drake manages to not only fetishize but also invalidate the identities of queer women in just under three minutes and 41 seconds.  

“You said you might be into girls (into girls)/ You said you’re going through a phase (through a phase)/ Keepin’ your heart safe (keepin’ your heart safe, oh)/ Well maybe you can bring a friend (bring a friend)/ She gon’ ride on top your face (top your face)/While I f*ck you straight (while I f*ck you straight, yeah),” The Weeknd sang in his song “Lost in Fire.”  

While I f*ck you straight? What is wrong with these men? Listen close, you cannot turn a queer woman straight. Your dick is not going to change our identities. I cannot even begin to count the number of times men have said their c*cks can convert me. I DO NOT WANT YOUR URETHERAL SLUDGE INFESTED D*CK. I AM A LESBIAN. The whole point of being a lesbian is not having men involved; yet men make it their life’s mission to get involved in our business. Stop treating lesbians as objects that you can conquer.  

Men are not the only people using toxic and degrading language at the expense of lesbian women. There are numerous female musicians who are part of the problem. Ashnikko’s song “Slumber Party,” perpetuates negative stereotypes about the relationships of women loving women. “Me and your girlfriend playin’ dress up at my house/ I gave your girlfriend cunnilingus on my couch,” Ashnikko sings.  

Come on Ashnikko, you are a queer woman. Why are you making us appear as these sexually deviant beings? Why are you perpetuating a stereotype that queer women cheat on their boyfriends? Does it not count as cheating because you do not think our relationships are valid? Is kissing another woman just an experimental game to you? 

Your lyrics are hurting your community. Lesbians are not a fetish for the male gaze. Women loving women relationships are never seen as valid and you are part of the problem. Our relationships are not deemed as legitimate if they are not sexually pleasing to men. 

What is with this creepy obsession of lesbians in the music industry? Musicians need to learn that you cannot use our identities to add a seductive panache to your music.  

I can assure you Kanye that the blonde d*ke you mentioned in your song “Stronger” has no interest in you. The same goes for you A$AP Rocky- d*kes do not want to sleep with you. Liam Payne, I know you think you have got something to prove because you are the runt of One Direction, but bisexual women do not exist for threesomes. I am a girl who wants girls, but I do not want you fetishizing it.  

Leave lesbians out of your lyrics, 

Zaynab