‘The boom splat’


Sarah Lentz, Opinion Editor

All day, Meryl Streep’s rendition of “Last Midnight,” from “Into the Woods,” has been playing in my head because this is my “last midnight, the boom splat.” In a few weeks my Wayne State College life will end and I’ll enter the dreaded real world.

Even though advice columns from outgoing seniors are cliché (see Laura Anderson’s column last week), I’m going to drop some knowledge bombs on you whipper snappers.

Study. Don’t be that jackwagon who complains they have so much to do and not enough time during a ten-hour video game bender. Play video games. Have fun. Get your work done first, though. That person is very hard to have sympathy for.

Budget. Student loans are going to slap you and slap you hard after graduation. Start saving right now. Those refund checks are real nice and come in handy to live off of, but if you stash some cash, do it.

Don’t be that person. They’re in every class and they are infuriating—Butt-kissers. The people who make people with jobs or friends or an actual life outside of any given class, want to scream when they overenthusiastically agree to that extra assignment the professor is so kindly offering. No one likes you butt-kissers. Staaahp. It’s college, you’re not getting any brownie points from Teach, and if you are, at what cost? Your whole class hating you, that’s the cost.

Get out of your own head. I see so many high-strung people, trudging miserably through college, opining that they’re terrible and they can’t rise to the challenge that faces them. Trust me, you can. College is supposed to be fun. Stay up all night. If you’re of legal age, get drunk once (or more), binge on Netfilx with or without the chill, I don’t know your life. Just have some fun and for God’s sake loosen up.

After graduation we’re all in for a lifetime of boring, adult monotony. Have some fun, make some memories and pass your classes.