Last month, if you walked along the sidewalks on campus, you might have seen some pro-life statements drawn in chalk on the concrete. While some argued that these statements avoided real conversation, I personally found it a relief that there wasn’t an entire pro-life arguments sprawled on the sidewalks. Could you imagine what kind of maze it would be to avoid stepping on one of those gross fallacies?

In either case, this week has led to some confusion for the pro-life students who no longer have a place to argue. Grace-Faith Christianson, a pro-life student in a university, talked about these issues: “I went outside this morning, in the glorious beautiful rain our Lord has provided for us, and the chalk just floated right away. I thought it might be a sign from God, but I don’t understand why he would want us to stop spreading the good word.”

But Grace-Faith isn’t going to just give up on spreading the good word. She considered hosting a political forum and has also looked at the idea of simply yelling slurs at local women getting birth control. While the political forum allows her to argue for her cause, the yelling idea sounds a lot more fun. Along with that, a political forum would make it so people could leave if they were done listening to her, but if she goes to yell slurs at people getting birth control, they HAVE to listen to her while she preaches about how much more Jesus is going to hug her in the afterlife.

The worst part of her speech, for the sinners that have to listen, is when she describes Jesus’ wonderful love that only occurs for her: “After I die having loved the Lord, Jesus will wrap me up in his big beautiful blanket arms tell me that you’re burning and in eternal pain, but I get to sit there feeling just mildly warm. God is great! God is loving! But only if you obey the things that a bunch of pedophiles tell you 2000 years after the last time he was here.”

Well, God may have stopped Grace-Faith from sprawling her chalk fallacies on the sidewalk, but surprisingly the growing amounts of rainfall hasn’t stopped Grace-Faith from yelling shockingly mean things at scared teenagers. This truly is the work of God!