The neighbor boy had come over to see my stepson, and he was gibbering on as usual. And it was fast. Very fast. It was actually a strain to keep up with what he had to say. He’s a video game connoisseur,...

There’s a guy in the pub, and when you shake his hand, he holds it for a long time. And he talks—a lot. And he does it as he holds you captive. But the good thing is, I like what he has to say....

It was Labor Day weekend, and I did like many Americans—I tried not to labor. I sat on my back deck in the shade with a cocktail and tried to tune everything out. Occasionally, when I found the strength,...

It’s late here in the sleepy hills of Ponca, and I’m banging my fingers on the keys. My cat is extra mean tonight. He was in a showdown with the neighbor’s cat and apparently sh*t is on. Cats...

I’m in L.A. right now, staring out the window on the 18th floor of the Westin Bonaventure Hotel. There’s no smog like they all predicted and I can actually see the Hollywood sign looming over the city. I...

Tonight has been strange. I had been doing some painting and the fumes were a bit strong which must have made me extra vulnerable to having some kind of religious experience. It all started when I thought...

Sometimes things get tough. And sometimes things get really tough and then weird. And then after that, you start to wonder if, just maybe, someone put something in your drink. Yesterday, I had a religious...

Lately, I’ve been drawing circles on the floor of my office. Doing my best Faustus, conjuring up Keith Richards (my own personal Mephistopheles). “Oh world (my hand placed on forehead in a semi-dramatic...

Well, it’s official. I look and feel like Nick Nolte after his arrest—but without the tropical shirt and any of that fame sh**[explicit]. Things are getting out of hand here on Rancho de Chad and I...

I’m sitting in my Jeep in the Walmart parking lot nervously eating Tramadol (oh, it’s a prescription, don’t you worry), trying to understand why I’m even here. The word necessities is what I keep...

Ah, here it is— Death. And by Death I mean winter, everyone’s favorite and most lovable season. What a load of crap. Old Man Winter is a cruel and evil tyrant and all his lame shenanigans are messing...

This last Friday around midnight I found myself leaping from couch to couch, buck-naked except for a cowboy hat and a fully modified Nerf N-Strike Maverick REV-6 pistol with all intentions of making a...