My favorite hobby is making bad decisions. With that being said, my “Spooky Squad” group chat decided to summon some demons in an abandon location.

I’m going to refer to the house as an undisclosed location, because it may or may not have been trespassing.

We set our Ouija board down on one of the flipped couches, because sitting on the caved in floor wasn’t the move. Joe thoughtfully brought three tea candles to set up around the board. So, the three of us are all sitting around this board in the dark at 10 p.m. and we’re ready to ask questions.

Me, being me of course, thought it would be good to start out with some easy questions. I asked the board if I was ugly. Bri and Joe immediately pushed it to yes, but I’d like to think the demon disagrees.

We weren’t getting any demon action, so we decided to switch locations. The next place was a park in town that used to be a graveyard. As we pulled up, we saw a group of middle schoolers that were standing in a cult-like circle.

The cult seemed like they were up to their own spooky shit, so I immediately wasn’t in the mood to deal with it.

Our third and final location of the night was an old park behind my best friend’s house. We sat at a park bench under some old street lamps and tried the board again. Allegedly we were talking to a ghost named “Ron.”

My theory is that Joe moved the board and made it seem like he didn’t. The street lights would flicker before he asked a question, which he was using to say that “it was a sign.” Unfortunately, no ghosts were conjured, besides the ghost of my love life.