Endorsement of Hillary Clinton

Staff Editorial

Mason Schweizer, Opinion Editor

Well, friends, the dreaded time is finally upon us. On Tuesday, the masses will arrive at their local polling destination and cast their vote for the 45th President of the United States. The majority of level-headed Americans have waited, hoped and pleaded that, by some miracle, it would be revealed that this election was all a giant hoax and we would finally be presented with real candidates.

Alas, we had no such luck. Three televised debates came and went, with nobody remembering what either candidate had to say about their policies or ideas on making America better. All we remember is the hate and bulls**t that Donald J. Trump and Hillary Rodham Clinton spewed at each other. We don’t remember their thoughts on education, but we remember Trump has questionably sized hands. How is the American public supposed to take this election seriously when neither of the major candidates seems to be?

And now, with the knowledge of where Trump likes to lend his hands and not much else, the people are being asked to choose the next leader of the free world. After some deliberation and unsuccessful campaigning for the ghost of Abraham Lincoln (seriously, who opposes that?), the staff of The Wayne Stater has collectively decided to endorse Hillary Rodham Clinton. And the reasoning behind her support is seemingly because she is the least bad candidate, not because she is the best candidate.

Because how could we support Gary Johnson, a guy who, when asked what national leader he gained his most inspiration from, couldn’t even think of a random leaders name to say, so he remained silent, until mumbling something incoherent about an old vice president of Mexico, although even then he couldn’t come up with an actual name.

Because how could we support Jill Stein when she has the archaic viewpoint that she holds on nuclear energy? Jill, the Cold War has been over for decades. Believe it or not, there is more to nuclear energy than dropping atomic bombs. And her free public college idea, while good in virtue, is simply unrealistic and desaturates the value of a college education. Jill Stein seems like the coolest grandma ever, but does anyone think that their cool grandma could run the nation?

And of course, how could we support Donald J. Trump? The walking Youtube comment board somehow made it this far and has a real shot at securing the election. Fears of a Trump-led nation, while many times exaggerated, range from the usual rich-get-richer to the eradication of a race of people to the end of the world due to nuclear warfare.

It’s been said many times by many people, but bears repeating—we as a country are probably pretty screwed. But at least Hillary will use lube.

Mason Schweizer for The Wayne Stater